UK needed its own Shenzhen experiment instead of Brexit: "Eden-Outside-EU"

By George ILIEV
Brexit Metaphor No 73

In 1980 China set up its first Special Economic Zone (SEZ) in the sleepy southern Chinese town of Shenzhen. When the experiment became a success, China rolled out the SEZ concept in other parts of the country.

Britain has been keen to experiment in distancing itself from the EU. However, the Brexit referendum was too large-scale and too risky as experiments go. You don't start administering a new medicine to 65 million people; you first test it on mice, then on a controlled group of humans, and only then you roll it out for general use.

Similarly, the UK should have conducted its own Shenzhen experiment in deregulation and de-EU-sation. Jersey, Guernsey and the Isle of Man already provided early case studies on various sets of exceptions from the EU firmament. But Britain then skipped a step and went straight for nationwide Brexit, while what it actually needed was a Shenzhen-sized experiment: a set of counties to carve out into a SEZ and place outside EU rules. 

Where could such an experiment have taken place? Northern Ireland would have been too sensitive; Scotland - too pro-European; and Wales - too deeply integrated in the British economy. So the UK should have chosen Cornwall for its "Shenzhen experiment".

Cornwall is not only relatively isolated and poor (i.e. not much to lose) but it also already had a knack for experimentation with the Eden Project. Brexiteers missed a trick by foregoing an "Eden-Outside-EU".

Shenzhen, southern China (Source: Wikipedia)

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Notes:
1. Timeline: This article is part of a series of original #BrexitMetaphors published daily. A total of 73 have been posted so far and another 88 Brexit Metaphors will be published every day until the planned Brexit date of March 29, 2019.
2. Disclosure: The author has a master's degree in European Integration. He also thinks he knows a bit about business, economics, entrepreneurship, China, history, geography, science and Rubik Cubes.
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Getting off the fence is harder than sitting on it

By George ILIEV
Brexit Metaphor No 72

The British are known as good diplomats. Part of being diplomatic is the skill and willingness to "sit on the fence", which Boris Johnson calls "eating your cake and having it", i.e. having it both ways.

Britain has been sitting "on the fence" of Europe for decades, if not centuries: one leg in, one leg out. The 2016 referendum, however, gave the UK government marching orders to take Britain off the fence and out of the EU. Yet, it is turning out surprisingly difficult for the UK to come down from its comfortable perch on the fence. 

Will Britain manage to get down without tearing its pants? And if Brexit does tear Britain's pants, would the same people still shout "Brexit is naked. Long live Brexit!"

Fence (Source: Wikipedia)

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Notes:
1. Timeline: This article is part of a series of original #BrexitMetaphors published daily. A total of 72 have been posted so far and another 89 Brexit Metaphors will be published every day until the planned Brexit date of March 29, 2019.
2. Disclosure: The author has a master's degree in European Integration. He also thinks he knows a bit about business, economics, entrepreneurship, China, history, geography, science and Rubik Cubes.
3. Invitation: If you'd like to contribute to the debate, please leave a comment below or re-tweet the blogpost link.
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EU is a beehive that UK views as a hornets' nest

By George ILIEV
Brexit Metaphor No 71

The EU member states all contribute to the Union in different ways, like the bees with their specialised roles in a beehive. The UK, however, views the EU as a hornets' nest: not only unproductive but also potentially dangerous for Britain with its model of development towards an "ever closer union".

Beehive (Source: Wikipedia)

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Notes:
1. Timeline: This article is part of a series of original #BrexitMetaphors published daily. A total of 71 have been posted so far and another 90 Brexit Metaphors will be published every day until the planned Brexit date of March 29, 2019.
2. Disclosure: The author has a master's degree in European Integration. He also thinks he knows a bit about business, economics, entrepreneurship, China, history, geography, science and Rubik Cubes.
3. Invitation: If you'd like to contribute to the debate, please leave a comment below or re-tweet the blogpost link.
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The EU has LCD traits but suffers from LSD effects

By George ILIEV
Brexit Metaphor No 70

When Leave-voting Brits look at the EU, some confuse LCD traits with LSD effects. 

EU rules are the lowest common denominator (LCD) for 28 member states: northern and southern; western and eastern; right and left; rich and poor. For the Single Market to function, some basic regulations and policies need to be implemented across the continent. Without common rules, the "race to the bottom" in taxation or environmental protection, for example, would skew the level playing field. Britain detests being given regulations from Brussels, but without them the Single Market could not exist.

On the other hand, when some Brexiteers look at the EU, they see things or hear voices that do not exist, as if they were under the influence of the hallucinogenic drug LSD. The mirage list includes, for example:
- the phoney threat of migration of millions of Syrian refugees;
- a double-digit tax take and budget redistribution by Brussels (while the EU actually takes only 1.2% of the GDP of the member states);
- a laundry list of 700 myths about the EU that British tabloids have been spreading for decades.

Sadly, exposing the one-letter difference between mathematics and hallucination is probably too little too late to counteract four decades of misinformation.

Mirage (Source: Wikipedia)

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Notes:
1. Timeline: This article is part of a series of original #BrexitMetaphors published daily. A total of 70 have been posted so far and another 91 Brexit Metaphors will be published every day until the planned Brexit date of March 29, 2019.
2. Disclosure: The author has a master's degree in European Integration. He also thinks he knows a bit about business, economics, entrepreneurship, China, history, geography, science and Rubik Cubes.
3. Invitation: If you'd like to contribute to the debate, please leave a comment below or re-tweet the blogpost link.
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Can Brexit help a dog evolve back into a wolf, or at least a dingo?

By George ILIEV
Brexit Metaphor No 69

Dogs evolved from wolves that adapted to live close to human settlements and gradually started cooperating with humans over some 10,000 years. Dogs have gained genes for digesting starch to make use of grain-derived human food, while even puppies recognise a basic pointing human gesture without being taught.

The UK evolved in the last 45 years in close cooperation with the EU: Britain's economy and trade are geared towards making efficient use of European markets and supply chains, while UK law transposes the 108,000 legal documents contained in the EU body of law (acquis communautaire).

With Brexit looming on the horizon, the British "dog" that had learned to live with and inside the EU will now need to learn to live on its own again, like a wolf. And if this is not possible, the far-flung Commonwealth provides a hybrid alternative, the dingo: a feral dog that lives in the Australian wilderness but is descended from domesticated ancestors.

Britain should be free to decide to become a "dingo". However, in the process it will not only need to learn to hunt for food in the wild again; it will also need to be careful not to take on the reputation of dingoes for eating human babies (an economic policy of extreme deregulation, commonly known as Singapore-on-Thames).

Australian dingo with a fish (Source: Wikipedia)

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Notes:
1. Timeline: This article is part of a series of original #BrexitMetaphors published daily. A total of 69 have been posted so far and another 92 Brexit Metaphors will be published every day until the planned Brexit date of March 29, 2019.
2. Disclosure: The author has a master's degree in European Integration. He also thinks he knows a bit about business, economics, entrepreneurship, China, history, geography, science and Rubik Cubes.
3. Invitation: If you'd like to contribute to the debate, please leave a comment below or re-tweet the blogpost link.
4. Sign-up: I would be thrilled if you signed up to receive my blog daily by entering your email address in the blank in the top right-hand corner of this page.
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EU is a punchbag for ungrateful politicians. Dogs, beware!

By George ILIEV
Brexit Metaphor No 68

Punchbag is probably the most relevant Brexit metaphor for Boxing Day (December 26). The EU and the EU institutions have served as a convenient punchbag for the ungrateful politicians of the 28 member states for decades: you can hit a punchbag but the punchbag does not hit you back. 

National governments traditionally pass on the blame to Brussels for any unpopular policy or legislation, while taking the fame for all good news. Little wonder that half the tabloid-reading population of certain member states now (unfairly) equate the EU punchbag with douchebag. And if you think the punchbag on the photo below looks like gallows, you are right: 

"Give a dog a bad name and hang him."

Punching bag (Source: Wikipedia)

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Notes:
1. Timeline: This article is part of a series of original #BrexitMetaphors published daily. A total of 68 have been posted so far and another 93 Brexit Metaphors will be published every day until the planned Brexit date of March 29, 2019.
2. Disclosure: The author has a master's degree in European Integration. He also thinks he knows a bit about business, economics, entrepreneurship, China, history, geography, science and Rubik Cubes.
3. Invitation: If you'd like to contribute to the debate, please leave a comment below or re-tweet the blogpost link.
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Will Brexit Santa bring Brexit to naughty politicians?

By George ILIEV
Brexit Metaphor No 67

Santa Claus supposedly does not bring gifts to naughty children. The biggest gift for Brexiteers is Brexit, so they are eagerly awaiting. But will the Brexit Santa deliver on March 29, 2019? Or will the naughty Brexiteer politicians be exposed for their over-promising and truth-stretching?

Saint Nicholas was the 4th century Christian bishop from whom the Santa Claus tradition originates. Saint Nicholas lived in Anatolia. Would the Brexit politicians be happy with a gift from Anatolia instead, e.g. Syrian refugees sent for resettlement?

Santa Claus (Source: Wikipedia)

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Notes:
1. Timeline: This article is part of a series of original #BrexitMetaphors published daily. A total of 67 have been posted so far and another 94 Brexit Metaphors will be published every day until the planned Brexit date of March 29, 2019.
2. Disclosure: The author has a master's degree in European Integration. He also thinks he knows a bit about business, economics, entrepreneurship, China, history, geography, science and Rubik Cubes.
3. Invitation: If you'd like to contribute to the debate, please leave a comment below or re-tweet the blogpost link.
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The gifts of the Brexit Magi: Nigel Farage, Boris Johnson, Jacob Rees-Mogg

By George ILIEV
Brexit Metaphor No 66

Three wise men brought gifts for Brexit. 

1. Nigel Farage brought democracy, for he learned democracy at the European Parliament which gave him a platform in 1999. He has been serving democracy as an MEP in the European Parliament ever since.

2. Boris Johnson brought the prospect of free trade deals, the promise of 350 million pounds a week, and some cake. He thought he could do with cake what Jesus did with the five loaves of bread and the two fish. Sadly, the cake only lasted as long as no one had eaten it. Boris was tired and hungry on the way, so he ate the cake.

3. Jacob Rees-Mogg brought the 18th century, for he was "the honourable member for the 18th century." 

The British people were all delighted.

The three wise men (Source: Wikipedia)

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Notes:
1. Timeline: This article is part of a series of original #BrexitMetaphors published daily. A total of 66 have been posted so far and another 95 Brexit Metaphors will be published every day until the planned Brexit date of March 29, 2019.
2. Disclosure: The author has a master's degree in European Integration. He also thinks he knows a bit about business, economics, entrepreneurship, China, history, geography, science and Rubik Cubes.
3. Invitation: If you'd like to contribute to the debate, please leave a comment below or re-tweet the blogpost link.
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Hard Brexit may bring Death by Coconut to Britain

By George ILIEV
Brexit Metaphor No 65

Leaving the EU is presented by Brexiteers as easy: faraway lands must be longing for trade deals with the UK. Life after Brexit appears almost as easy and idyllic as a stroll in a grove of coconut trees. But if a falling ripe coconut hits you directly during such a stroll, you may be seriously injured or even die - what is commonly known as death by coconut.

Hard Brexit would deal Britain exactly this type of a blow. And if you don't like the death-by-coconut metaphor, Brazil nuts have an even more lethal effect on anyone who happens to be under the tree.

If only Brexit were a sentient person, Shakespeare might have advised: 

Neither a coconut, nor a Brazil nut be!

Coconut palm grove (Source: Wikipedia)

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Notes:
1. Timeline: This article is part of a series of original #BrexitMetaphors published daily. A total of 65 have been posted so far and another 96 Brexit Metaphors will be published every day until the planned Brexit date of March 29, 2019.
2. Disclosure: The author has a master's degree in European Integration. He also thinks he knows a bit about business, economics, entrepreneurship, China, history, geography, science and Rubik Cubes.
3. Invitation: If you'd like to contribute to the debate, please leave a comment below or re-tweet the blogpost link.
4. Sign-up: I would be thrilled if you signed up to receive my blog daily by entering your email address in the blank in the top right-hand corner of this page.
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EU Facade shatters British Blind Spot in clash of Johari Windows

By George ILIEV
Brexit Metaphor No 64

The UK and the EU are two Johari Windows, each with its own typical set of 4 quadrants: from "known knowns" to "unknown unknowns". 

1) British Johari Window:
In its interaction with the EU, the UK is in the Blind Spot quadrant: Britain thinks it has power in the negotiation while in reality it has limited clout. Because of the British Empire, the victory in the 2nd World War (WW2), the Commonwealth and the English language, Britain thinks it is still a great power, while  in the new world order it is merely a medium-sized country.

2) EU Johari Window:
In its interaction with the UK, the EU is in the Facade quadrant: It presents a strong position externally, but actually it knows that it is internally fragile. The EU is a global trading giant and sets global benchmarks for regulations and environmental standards but its member states (including the UK) have been passing on to Brussels the blame for any negative domestic policy for decades, commonly known as Brussels-bashing. As a result, the sustainability and survival of the EU is contingent on projecting external power to convince its constituent members that it is worth sticking with.

When elephants fight, the grass suffers. When windows collide, the glass shatters. The EU has held the high ground in the negotiations with the UK but if Britain's withdrawal spirals out of control into Hard Brexit, there will be many losers.

Diagram of Johari Window (Source: Wikipedia)

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Notes:
1. Timeline: This article is part of a series of original #BrexitMetaphors published daily. A total of 64 have been posted so far and another 97 Brexit Metaphors will be published every day until the planned Brexit date of March 29, 2019.
2. Disclosure: The author has a master's degree in European Integration. He also thinks he knows a bit about business, economics, entrepreneurship, China, history, geography, science and Rubik Cubes.
3. Invitation: If you'd like to contribute to the debate, please leave a comment below or re-tweet the blogpost link.
4. Sign-up: I would be thrilled if you signed up to receive my blog daily by entering your email address in the blank in the top right-hand corner of this page.
5. Thank you for being here!

Britain outside EU magnetic field would be "left out in the rain"

By George ILIEV
Brexit Metaphor No 63

The EU protects its member states like the Earth's magnetic field protects the planet from the high-energy charged particles in solar wind and cosmic rays. The EU achieves this by placing foreign trade, competition policy and various other economic and financial regulations under the exclusive jurisdiction of the European Commission and the European Court of Justice. Thus, if China, Russia or the USA try to escalate a conflict over economic issues with a certain EU member state, they face the united front of the EU-wide Customs Union and Single Market.

If Britain leaves the EU, it will have to face foreign powers on its own, at least in economic matters if not in foreign policy and security. For example, Russian President Vladimir Putin advised the British Prime Minister to implement the 2016 referendum result in a televised news conference on December 20. 

Foreign countries can meddle in domestic politics when there is no magnetic field to stop them: this is what the British would call to be "left out in the rain".

Earth's magnetic field (Source: Wikipedia)

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Notes:
1. Timeline: This article is part of a daily #BrexitMetaphors series, with 98 more Brexit Metaphors to follow until Brexit day, March 29, 2019.
2. Disclosure: The author has a master's degree in European Integration.
3. Invitation: If you'd like to contribute to the debate, you are welcome to leave a comment below.

Brexit is a cashew nut: a misnamed seed of emotion

By George ILIEV
Brexit Metaphor No 62

If the apple gave rise to original sin, a cashew apple may have given rise to Brexit: the original sin of British "emotion politics".

Britain does not grow cashews, a tropical fruit from Brazil. Yet, Brexit very much resembles the cashew.

The cashew nut comes from the cashew apple. Botanically the cashew nut is not a real nut but rather a fruit seed, and the cashew apple is not a real apple but rather a drupe (a fleshy fruit with a stone). So there seems to be some disconnect between the description and the facts of biological reality. On the other hand, the disconnect with political and economic reality is visible in the Brexit process: neither is Brexit a solution to Britain's issues, nor is the EU the source of the problem.

The analogy, however, does not stop here. The strangest thing about the cashew nut (seed) is that it grows not inside but outside the fruit. This is why the botanical name of the cashew is Anacardium (Greek for "the heart is out"). And this perfectly describes Brexit: people poured their heart out in the 2016 referendum, as hostility to globalisation and the discontent with the slow recovery from the 2008 financial crisis took their toll in the 2016 referendum. When emotions boiled over and triumphed over the facts, the seed of dissatisfaction emerged from the fruit as a Brexit "nut". 

Is it a surprise then that Brexiteer politicians all look and sound a bit nutty?

Cashew apples and nuts (Source: Wikipedia)

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Notes:
1. Timeline: This article is part of a daily #BrexitMetaphors series, with 99 more Brexit Metaphors to follow until Brexit day, March 29, 2019.
2. Disclosure: The author has a master's degree in European Integration.
3. Invitation: If you'd like to contribute to the debate, you are welcome to leave a comment below.

Brexit advice: When you burn your bridges, don't run out of runway and burn yourself

By George ILIEV
Brexit Metaphor No 61

Successful entrepreneurs apply a strategy called "burn your bridges": ensure that there is no turning back. This means you should stop doing anything else and should focus exclusively on your startup. 

There are two underlying reasons for this strategy: time and commitment. 
1) Time: burning your bridges, e.g. by quitting your day job, allows you to focus and allocate the time to work through all the iterations necessary to bring the startup to success. 
2) Commitment: if you don't burn your bridges, when the going gets tough you may be tempted to go back to your day job and abandon the startup unreasonably early.

Britain's enthusiasm to start new free trade agreements with faraway non-EU countries is commendable. Asia is the place where, on current trends, most of the growth will take place in the 21st century. So a strategy that focuses on Asia can be seen as Britain's "burn your bridges" approach: create a sense of urgency and look at the future, never looking back at the past.

However, entrepreneurs also have to take into consideration another factor called "runway", i.e. how long you can finance your startup's survival until it starts generating revenue or until you can raise more capital by selling equity. New projects usually require at least 6-12 months of runway.

Some Brexiteers are keen to deploy Hard Brexit and "burn Britain's bridges" with Europe. The problem is Britain's runway is severely limited: the country will run out of runway almost immediately if it crashes out of the EU without an agreement. So the UK may face a situation where it has burnt its bridges but in the process has set its own castle on fire.

Could Britain develop a strategic focus on Asia without burning its bridges with Europe? Couldn't "cakeism" (have your cake and eat it) be applied to trade with both Europe and Asia simultaneously? And if the UK had to choose, should it choose the bird in the sky rather than the bird in the hand?

Is there a different conclusion to this episode of the Brexit drama? Can anyone think of a justification for burning your bridges if you will run out of runway straight away and will burn yourself in the process.

So here is a final word of warning: when you burn your bridges, be careful not to burn your breeches, lest you end up a sans-culottes.

Tower Bridge, London (Source: Wikipedia)

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Notes:
1. Timeline: This article is part of a daily #BrexitMetaphors series, with 100 more Brexit Metaphors to follow until Brexit day, March 29, 2019.
2. Disclosure: The author has a master's degree in European Integration.
3. Invitation: If you'd like to contribute to the debate, you are welcome to leave a comment below.

Brexit is locking yourself out of the EU house. Think twice!

By George ILIEV
Brexit Metaphor No 60

Have you ever locked yourself out of the house? Ever heard the door slam shut behind you and you didn't have the keys? This is how Brexit will feel if Britain does leave the EU.

The EU has been metaphorically described as "Hotel California": the one on a dark desert highway that "you can never leave." However, the EU is actually exactly the opposite: you can leave it with some difficulty, but once you do - there is no going back. If the door slams shut behind Britain, it will never be able to go back in again, as EU membership would require adopting the euro, giving up the UK's budget rebate (handbagged by Margaret Thatcher in 1985) and following a bunch of other policies that new EU member states have to accept, while some older member states have negotiated opt-outs.

So maybe to avoid the locking out scenario, we have to listen to Celine Dion instead:

Be sure before you close that door

Before you roll those dice

Baby think twice!

Metal door (Source: Wikipedia)

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Notes:
1. Timeline: This article is part of a daily #BrexitMetaphors series, with 101 more Brexit Metaphors to follow until Brexit day, March 29, 2019.
2. Disclosure: The author has a master's degree in European Integration.
3. Invitation: If you'd like to contribute to the debate, you are welcome to leave a comment below.

Brexit Kettle has been calling Remain Pot black. Soon it will call it quits.

By George ILIEV
Brexit Metaphor No 59

When an electric kettle reaches boiling point, it switches off. 
When the Brexit Kettle reaches boiling point any day now, it will shut down; the bubbles of hot gas will stop forming; and the delirious madness of the Leave camp will be "brought under control" instead of their frenzied goal of "taking back control" (possibly even in the run-up to a second referendum). The options for Brexit are now so clearly inferior to the UK's current arrangement with the EU that it is almost unthinkable how a civilised country like Britain could end up leaving.

So, long story short, the Brexit Kettle has been calling the Remain Pot black for 2.5 years but soon the Brexit Kettle will simply have to call it quits.

Electric kettle (Source: Wikipedia)

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Notes:
1. Timeline: This article is part of a daily #BrexitMetaphors series, with 102 more Brexit Metaphors to follow until Brexit day, March 29, 2019.
2. Disclosure: The author has a master's degree in European Integration.
3. Invitation: If you'd like to contribute to the debate, you are welcome to leave a comment below.

Britain is a purring puma that thinks it's a roaring lion

By George ILIEV
Brexit Metaphor No 58

Some cats roar; others purr. Only the biggest 4 feline species can roar: lions, tigers, leopards and jaguars. The smaller felines can only purr. This is tough luck for the puma, which is a big cat but can only purr.

Britain is a puma that thinks it's a lion: some Brits still believe that the UK is a global power. So if it wanted to roar, would a roar be heard? 

Unfortunately, the spots for roaring felines have mostly been taken on the world stage by the USA, the EU, China and possibly one day India. This means all other countries are purring felines... which may mew at most if discontent. But the roaring lions may not even hear these mews: "Mew me if you can?".

Puma / Cougar (Source: Wikipedia)

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Notes:
1. Timeline: This article is part of a daily #BrexitMetaphors series, with 103 more Brexit Metaphors to follow until Br: lexit day, March 29, 2019.
2. Disclosure: The author has a master's degree in European Integration.
3. Invitation: If you'd like to contribute to the debate, you are welcome to leave a comment below.

UK & EU are not a divorcing couple but Siamese twins

By George ILIEV
Brexit Metaphor No 57

Britain's departure from the EU has often been described as a divorce. This metaphor has been handy for the Brexiteers but is not entirely precise as it does not fully reflect the difficulty of separation. A better metaphor would portray Britain and the EU as Siamese twins (conjoined twins) which have entered adulthood but now have to undergo medical surgery to be separated. 

The medical precision and skill required for such an operation is quite challenging. Yet, even more challenging is the imbalance between the two twins: one is fully formed, while the other is missing parts of some vital organs. Which would you guess is which?

Siamese twins, 19th century (Source: Wikipedia)

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Notes:
1. Timeline: This article is part of a daily #BrexitMetaphors series, with 104 more Brexit Metaphors to follow until Brexit day, March 29, 2019.
2. Disclosure: The author has a master's degree in European Integration.
3. Invitation: If you'd like to contribute to the debate, you are welcome to leave a comment below.